Chemo #10

We did not do chemo #10 today because my blood counts were too low, however, due to an increase in symptoms over the last few weeks we aren't going to wait any longer for scans. I will do them Monday morning (CT's of my chest, abdomen, and pelvis, and a bone scan). I will get the results at my Monday afternoon appointment. No waiting this time!

Thankful for?! People who give blood. Today my mom gave blood in support of Steve McGargill.


Guess the boys were good...

...Santa was at our house!


Tomorrow we celebrate Christmas...

...and I have been on the couch all day with a headache and throwing up tonight. Let's hope I get it all out of my system tonight, because I have lots of presents for the boys to open tomorrow...Andrew church, and family...please chemo, don't mess this up!
Thankful for!? Rest. Very glad I could rest today so that I can enjoy the holidays with my boys tomorrow. Fingers crossed!

ATTITUDE is everything!  *Tracy

Oral Surgeon

Good thing I don't have a fear of the the dentist or I might not have been too happy with Dr. Glenn for yanking on my jaw bone with a plyers!
The bone isn't ready to come out yet...don't know if that is good or bad, but I go back in a month.
I do, however, like it when he calls me "kiddo", even though he is my age or maybe even younger. =)
Thankful for!? A nice breakfast with the boys since school is out and maybe a little nap later too!

ATTITUDE is everything!  Amp it up! *Tracy


Ok, so I am a little slow. News? Not.

So, as scans come up I start to get scared and not to be less than inspirational, but I start to think about all the things that need to be accomplished before....well, you know, the bucket thing.
Anyway, it always comes back to writing a journal and putting together a photo album so that my boys will know/remember me and then tonight it hit me like a ton of bricks!!! That is what this BLOG is! Wow ...daunting task up-to-date!  As of now they know I type a blog but neither of the boys have tried to locate it. I hope it stays that way. I would prefer them to get it after the bucket kicking (no matter how soon or FAR away that is). I do have some handwritten journals for them also, with little things like 'tell your dad I said he would help pay for a limo for prom', how to treat girls/women, things that make me proud and little things I sang to them as babies, but the journal entries are few and far between.  And the photo album...empty. (sigh) Luckily, I have a lot of pics of us on this blog!
What am I thankful for!? Julie Johnston's advice to start this blog clear back in the spring of 2005! Thank you, Girl! Hugs!

ATTITUDE is everything!  Rock it! *Tracy


Hmmm....I wonder who this is!?

Sent via DROID on Verizon Wireless

Chemo was a go!

Chemo #9 is down and chemo #10 is next week...then scans. Doc wanted to do 12 instead of 10...I gave him 'the look' and he smiled and said 10 was fine for now!
Yay! Knowing what I am dealing with is half the battle, and the last time I knew exactly was 9/27/10! Three months and 10 treatments is long enough to tell if the treatments are working in my 'Im-not-a-doctor-and-I-haven't-even-played-one-on-tv' opinion!

What am I thankful for!? A doc that 'gets me', mom picking my kids up from school and dinner done when I got home (yummy!), and some chat time with the ever so funny 'yellow shirt'! Lol! OH, AND FINISHING MY CHRISTMAS SHOPPING FOR THE SECOND TIME. Being finished isn't very final...most of the time! 

ATTITUDE is everything!  Rock a fabulous one!!! *Tracy

Sleepless in Lincoln

Tonight I can't sleep due to bone pain from the shots I did this weekend to boost my wbc's and due to jaw pain.....this leaves me with lots of time to worry about my friends who are not doing well. My heart just breaks...
What could I possibly be thankful for?! My time with these wonderful boys who are sleeping peacefully next to me, and for all the researchers out there searching for answers!


Night with the Stars!

ATTITUDE is everything!  *Tracy

Magic Moments with the Stars

ATTITUDE is everything!  *Tracy

Holiday Lights from the Elves!

ATTITUDE is everything!  *Tracy

Quick update

Unfortunately, I don't have enough time to explain all the things that have happened in the last couple of weeks. I missed a chemo because despite my shots my blood counts were too low. Then the following week I took extra shots and was able to have chemo #8. Tomorrow will be chemo 9, then chemo #10 the following week, and then scans after the first of the year. I am ready for the scans because I have been having problems with rib pain on the opposite side of my known bone mets, I have increased pain in the area of my spinal mets, and I have sharp pains in the area of my liver...psychological or physical, the scans will help! Either we move to a different chemo, hopefully reducing the cancer, or I find out all is well and the aches and pains become less worrisome to may already scared self.

As far as good things going on, I was reminded that the spirit of Santa is truely alive. I had some very special people decorate my house with christmas lights when I was away from the house! That was a wonderful surprise to come home to! I cried happy tears for 30 minutes! I was so touched!
a week later Union Bank surprised our family with a night with the Stars, a night at CoCo Keys indoor water park, and a laptop and printer so I can start my book! It was all a part of their Magic Moments project and we really appreciate their kindness and the kindness of the American Cancer Society for nominating us for our charity work with them! Nothing makes us happier than to help out others that are going through the same thing we are going through.

What am I thankful for?! I am thankful for the good people that we are surrounded by, including friends, family, and the Southwood pastors and congregation! A very special thank you to Gail for passing on a message from Ginni, and to the woman at southwood who asked to pray with me and told me of her fathers miraculous cure of metastatic lung cancer! Life is good!



Well, today didn't start out very well. I was throwing up by 6am. Turns out my body didn't like my antibiotics. Went to get the kids from school, which included a long painful conversation with Skye about the fact that while be wants desperately to be a teenager, he isn't yet. Then I got new meds, drove almost home and had to pull over to puke. Made dinner, puked, and then took the boys to see Tangled.
On the way home Skye said, "Mom, I have been thinking a lot today, and our life would be really different if you weren't sick."  This is when I said, "I know" and "I am sorry", and the tears started streaming! (I HATE what cancer has done and I HATE how it limits all of us!) But of course, in true Skye form he says, "No mom, it os good, look at all the people we know because of it, and how much it has taught Laken and I. We will be better grown-ups."
Ugh!!! He is so mature and I am still so angry!!
What am I thankful for!? Christmas lights


What is this about?

For the last 4 days I have had reverse-morning sickness ...I feel fine all day and then throw up at night. I guess at least I don't have to start my day off badly!
Thankful for!? The knot blanket my sis made me...I am freezing! ...and Chelsea Lately who cracks me up!!!

Chemo fog, strep throat, kids dropped off at school...back to bed.

ATTITUDE is everything!  *Tracy